Married Single Mom

I just discovered the term ‘Married single mom’ and that it is deemed as a controversial topic. Being a mother myself, I can see why.

Motherhood in and of itself isn’t an easy journey. Each situation is unique in it’s own right. There are challenges that both single and married moms face. I am very well aware that even talking about this will get me in hot water because, while I am married, I can understand (and can relate) to how a married mother can feel single. It may seem completely unintentional on the part of the father, but the mother usually inherits the mental load that comes with having children. Yes, there’s been a shift in recent decades and fathers have picked up more of the load, but there’s an invisible mental load that usually falls on the mothers shoulders.

Recently, a video went viral that involved a mother being the one soley responsible for taking the kids out of the car and bringing them into the house while the father was playing on his phone. You can find the story here.

For me, it raises a ton of questions, with the biggest one being why does a mother have to be the one who constantly has to ask for help? There comes a point where she is going to stop asking because it’s easier to just do (constantly asking can make any mother feel defeated for a myiad of reasons). It takes 2 to tango in any relationship and if it’s feeling very one sided, trying to explain it can sometimes be harder than it needs to be.

While I agree that single mothers may have it harder than mothers who are married – married mothers are supposed to have that built in support with a husband around – but there are situations where a married mother can find herself feeling as though she is single because the support she needs isn’t there and no amount trying to involve the husband is working.